The nursing fairy
December 4th, 2006 by amylherzog
Before I say anything, Jacob would just like you to know:
dadadadadadadadadadadadada…
…DaDaDaDaDaDaDaDaDaDaDaDa…
…DADADADADADADADADADADADADADADADADADA!!!!!
(Got that?)
*****
Anyone who has shown even the slightest willingness to let me whine at them over the last 6 months knows how tired I am of nursing. At the same time, I appreciate how important it is to Jacob and I don’t want to simply stop without any give and take. So over the course of the last three months, I’ve tried out several weaning strategies and attempts.
We started with “don’t offer, don’t refuse”, which didn’t really change anything at all. Then came offering the sippy cup instead, which worked about half the time. After a month (?) of this, I realized that what really made me loathe nursing was the impact it had on our sleep. We (mostly) night-weaned, and things got a lot better. Recently, I stopped the ’snack bar’ approach to nursing during the day and established set nurse-times for Jacob: first waking, nap times, his bedtime, our bedtime, and usually around 5am I’d give in to his pestering so that I could nab another hour of sleep. We went to Jacob’s 15-month wellness visit recently, and the doctor said “absolutely not” to sleep-feedings because of increased risk of tooth decay. So one week ago, we cut out the nursing at our bedtime. Tonight, we cut out the 5am.
And I have to say, going through all of this structure, all of these attempts, really seems to have brought into relief what nursing does for Jacob. It’s his security blanket, in a nutshell–he doesn’t suck on a pacifier, have a lovey toy or blanket, hell, he doesn’t even feel the need to stay within sight 80% of the time. But when he’s feeling crummy, when he’s in a new situation, when he’s waking up hard from a nap and is all disoriented, he asks to nurse. And when I let him nurse at these times, it’s like I’ve been visited by the magical nursing fairy in all of those Dr. Sears books. Jacob snuggles into my lap, cuddles his arms around me, and hangs out for 5 minutes or so while nursing. Then he gets up and does his own thing.
It really is one of the sweetest feelings in the world. And after all of the nursing elimination we’ve gone through, it’s incredibly lovely to have the final few nursings per day be these cuddly bonding experiences. And this leaves me in a place I would never have predicted two months ago: Am I desperate to cut these last few feedings out and wean Jacob entirely? Not at all. I’m even feeling more relaxed about the “only at naptime” rule during the day.
Color me shocked.
Precious! Absolutely Precious! Thanks so much for sharing. The day will come when he is too busy to stop long enough to nurse-even if he is waking up hard.
Your write so beautifull, I feel the love you and Jacob are experiencing.
Good for you!
Love, Bev